Our national airline, BA - which many people think stands for British Airways but actually stands for Bloody Awful - have gone and made a right royal cock-up. Prince William and Kate Middleton took a first class BA flight home from their first tour as a royal couple, returning from LA to London, but before the flight even took off, the in-flight entertainment system malfunctioned leaving them unable to watch a movie during the 10-hour journey.
The technical difficulty only affected First and Business class passengers. Can you imagine it? The people in economy who just bought their ticket for £250 from lastminute.com, are happily curled up in their Adidas tracksuits trying to decide whether to watch Harry Potter or Jackass 3D. And there you are, sitting in First Class, having shelled out £3600 for your seat, with nothing to do for 10 hours except talk to your husband. Its enough to make you ask for a parachute, isn't it?
Fortunately, Will & Kate have been married for only 11 weeks so probably aren't yet at the stage where having a conversation with eachother seems about as appealing as sucking your own eyeballs. But thank God it wasn't the Queen and Prince Philip who, despite having been married since 1947, reputedly haven't spent ten hours alone together in total. Which is one reason their marriage has lasted so long.
I recently went to a wedding in Mallorca. I was the 'date' of my girlfriend Julie, and the wedding was of two of her friends from New York. We were the only single people there (except for one slutty blonde and one single guy Kenny, and oh boy is that a story for another time) and nothing makes me want to be rich and married less than hanging out with rich and married people.
Julie, on the other hand, is yearning to walk down the aisle, and looked enviously at the other couples attending the wedding. By the fifth day, I pointed out to her that although we had sat at breakfast with the couple she was envying the most - attractive, early 40's, two cute children - we hadn't yet actually seen them speak to eachother. They seemed to have their routine - she would read the newspaper and he would jiggle the baby, then he would read the newspaper and she would feed, burp and change the baby - but we had yet to see them exchange a sentence. If this was marriage, I couldn't see what was so great about it for anyone other than the baby.
Not that being single necessarily leads to more conversation though. The slutty blonde and Kenny weren't speaking by day 5 either.
Maybe men and women just aren't meant to speak. I mean, really, men and women have been talking to eachother for years, and what good has ever come of it? When women talk about whatever is troubling us, do men really understand? And when men talk about whatever is troubling them, do we really give a rats ass?
Which is why having to spend 10 hours on a plane together without 13 tv channels to distract us would be awful.
Bloody Awful, in fact.
Footnote: As an apology, BA have offered all first class passengers a £200 voucher towards future flights, which surely had any savvy customers asking if they are redeemable against future Virgin Atlantic flights?
0 comments:
Post a Comment